Today I danced as part of my morning routine, I danced like I did as a kid with my heart open ready to receive all that God has for me. I twirled and bounced and giggled and cried as I danced with joy fully alive, fully me, allowing the little girl to play and enjoy being alive. I recognized and acted upon the longing in me to burst out of the small spaces in my heart, to reclaim me and live fully alive and to live all that I am no matter what.
Life has a way of robbing me of me….do you know what I mean? Do you ever feel like you miss yourself?
I can find myself going through the motions, distracting myself or numbing out to what it means for me to be fully alive to the heart centered, unique, creative, special creation God made in me. It’s easy for me to miss enjoying me as a part of God’s creation in the same way I enjoy the beach, the mountains, the meadows or any of the other breath taking parts of the universe He spoke into being.
But today, I just enjoyed me as a part of that breath taking creation, have you ever thought that you are just as breath taking as the most beautiful sunset? Do you enjoy you as a way to praise and worship, just because you are a part of creation?
Most of us don’t ever think of ourselves as breath taking, we hide our true light behind a myriad of false selves to become who we think others want us to be. We’ve learned that it’s too painful to be truly alive. We’ve learned that to be truly me means I get rejected and hurt so we hide her in the basement while our false self lives at the surface of our lives for everyone to see and interact with.
I get it, life deals some pretty harsh blows. For years I lived in the shadows of anger and abuse, I was ashamed and felt that somehow it was my fault, after all that’s what I was told as a kid when the adults in my life would misbehave. It became easier to hide my light than it did to dance.
But what if we all made the commitment to dance, to enjoy ourselves because we are declared very good? Can you imagine a space where we could dance together and laugh and play and live our healthiest, happiest self as a part of praise and worship.
What if for one moment you enjoyed yourself as a breathtaking creation and saw yourself as good, one worthy of the attention of the Creator of the universe who loves you and sees in you the best version of you but loves you at the worst. What if you saw yourself as one needed to be truly alive to give to the rest of humanity the gift of being fully you, that somehow those around you are missing out because you aren’t fully you.
I think that the joy of being me delights our creator more than all of my praise for the snow capped mountains or the vast depths of the oceans, I think He delights when I can finally praise Him for the creation that He made in me. When I praise Him because He made me a beautiful, unique, creative woman who loves to dance then I have hit the pinnacle of praise because I finally recognize the very essence of His image in me and delights His heart.